Lately I have been finding myself looking back over the last few years and searching for meaning in a personal relationship which I thought would last my lifetime. Although not in the way I had planned, this relationship could still prove to be one of the most influential in my life.
This may seem very like a very personal topic for me to be talking about here but I think it helps add to the character of what this site represents. Although mostly fitness-related I like to consider this site a close-knit community of people all trying to do the best that they can, with what they’ve got 🙂 And we all care about each other and the struggles we each have to face.
All aspects of our lives are interlinked and often have lasting influences on how we see ourselves, how we behave and whether we allow things, such as the people we know, the comments people make, the mood we are in, the changes that take place, to hold us back or propel us forward. This is why I think it is an important topic for me to talk about. I want to show that there is always a silver lining and there is always hope, because even the roughest paths have to lead somewhere and it is up to us to make the best of it.
Finding your way through life’s trials is meant to be challenging and we don’t always get things right. You can only do what you believe to be right at the time and accepting that is key, or else we would all live a life of regret and bitterness. I try to see the good in everything I have done, even the stuff I wish I’d done differently.
What I have learned lately, on the back of my recent break up, is the role certain people play in your life is not always what you believed it would be.
It’s easy to say “what a waste of time that was” or “why did I have to go through that?” or “why me?”, but the reality is there is simply nothing you can do to change what has already happened. So it’s better to see it for what it is than to question every last detail of “why”! I choose to believe that this relationship was a stepping stone to a new chapter in my life. I choose to see my life as one of those books you never want to put down, like you know the best is yet to come. I choose to live in hope.
“Fate”, “destiny”, “God’s Will” – call it what you wish, but I believe I would not be where I am today, had I not met Andrew. I would never have been taught how to lift weights properly, never ventured into the Strength and Conditioning room on my own, never have understood that women can lift heavy. From this, I would never have started Kettlebells or …. myomytv.com. Because of Andrew (and my drive to make the most of my interests), I now have so many amazing people in my life and so many things to look forward to. Now as one chapter fades, a new start is looming. I prefer to view life like this because it gives everything meaning.
While Andrew steered me in this direction, I was the one who was in the driver’s seat and I took action!
My point is, that even in the depths of what may seem like “the end”, there is always a choice and always action to be taken. Make the most of the opportunities that come your way, because they are merely fleeting moments in a life that is just too short.
Never drift through life expecting others to carry you, to make you happy, or to take the blame when things go wrong. It is you who is responsible for both your actions AND in-actions.
What I did was make the most of my new found love of fitness and saw that I could inspire and help others. Look at what has come of that simple plan. No point in just thinking about what you want or wondering about “what life might be like if…” – follow through!
A few things I have learned:
- Don’t ponder your life away.
- Don’t live in regret.
- Look for the silver-lining (I tell you, it’s there).
- Think about what you do have, rather than on what you don’t.
- Don’t expect the answers to land in your lap, if you have done nothing to seek them.
- And don’t expect results to happen just because you can know all the answers. Results happen when you use your knowledge, experience or lessons to take action.
At the end of the day actions speak louder than any thought or any word. Even if things don’t work out as planned, at least you know you tried!
I really hope this hasn’t just been a rambling mess of a post today or a lecture :-/ With the amount of thinking I have been doing I needed a positive outlet. What better way to do that than share my inner “ray” of hope.
It is only when we stand back and look at the path we have traveled can we truly see the direction it has taken us.
Given the chance, I wouldn’t change a thing. I am more proud of myself now than ever and I feel I have more value and purpose in my life because of how I have come through the other side of each and every hurdle. Yes, there are still times when I am upset that the path I thought I was on has gone, and I wish for the familiar back again, but over the last while I have come to realise that this hurting is a natural response to change. I was being burdened with a responsibility that was not mine to take and something had to give. Letting this go has be difficult but when have I ever run away from a challenge (except when Snatches are involved 😉 lol)!
Everything in our lives has an impact on our health, well-being and our training, so why shouldn’t we share the other challenges we have overcome or are working on – it’s all important 🙂
I posted this quote of Facebook the other day and I love it so much:
“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.” – Anatole France
Hopefully no one will mind my thoughts on this as I only want to share how everything seems to come together in the most unexpected ways. 😀
All the best for now.